• This article dismantles secular portrayals of the Mother of the Believers.
• It presents a true account of who Khadijah (RA) truly was.
The Feminist movement has caused carnage of an apocalyptic scale. It has cracked open a beehive of troubles for women, with swarms of stinging consequences that now seem impossible to escape, even for those within our ummah. Moreover, not only have the tentacles of Feminism reached out to our Muslim family but they have resulted in far damaging consequences— individuals attempting to distort the image of who the mother of the greatest nation is.
Ravaging the Ridiculous!
An argument gaining currency among a chorus of Muslim Feminists and compassionate Imam’s is that Khadijah RA was a career minded, ambitious, assertive, bolshie ‘Boss Babe’ who was ‘empowered enough’ to propose to Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w). This distorted depiction of Khadijah RA saddens me, as it grossly misrepresents her powerful legacy and the grace, wisdom, loyalty, love, trust, softness, generosity, obedience and beauty that defined her character.
I didn’t realise how far this narrative had spread until I once found myself at a snack table at an Islamic course, listening to a sister say something that made me do a double take. While adorned in jilbab, she told the sisters around her that they shouldn’t be shy to directly approach a brother if they liked him. She claimed that Khadijah (RA) did this. Hmm! Our sister, full of confidence in her words, might have glossed over a few key details—details that would flip this whole narrative on its head.
But let’s park that there for a second.
If you genuinely don’t know the particulars of who the mother of the believers is and what transpired; I’ve got no beef with you.
Who was Khadijah RA really?
Ummul Momineen Sayyedah Khadijah RA, was the first wife of Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w). She belonged to the noble family of Quraish. Due to her pious and virtuous character, the people of Makkah gave her the title Tahirah (pure/virtuous).
Khadijah RA recognised who Rasool Allah (s.a.w) was imminently. She was amazed— not only by Rasool Allah (s.a.w’s) skills in trade but more importantly by his impeccable character, honesty, and moral integrity. After recognising his qualities, she was interested in marriage. However, instead of proposing directly to him, she confided in her confidante, Nafisah bint Munyah, who approached the Prophet (s.a.w) on her behalf.
The marriage of Rasool Allah (s.a.w) and Khadijah (RA) is one of history’s greatest yet grossly underrated love stories—a profound and exemplary union with invaluable lessons. This remarkable relationship, which we will explore further in this article, was extraordinary for many reasons. Notably, the Prophet (s.a.w) chose to marry Khadijah (RA), a woman who had been twice widowed and was significantly older than him, demonstrating the depth of their connection- one that transcended boundaries and was built on unwavering devotion, mawaddah, rahma, and divine purpose.
Her Business
Khadijah (RA) inherited her business after the death of her first husband, Abu Halah and prior to marrying Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w). After her first husband’s passing, she continued running her business, gaining a reputation for being a successful and respected businesswoman in Makkah among the other more important aforementioned character traits she was known for.
If Khadijah RA were here today…
If Khadijah (RA) were here today, I am certain that she wouldn’t be climbing the career ladder as a salary partner to her husband. She wouldn’t be caught in the relentless rat race—hustling through early mornings, jumping on the Victoria line at 6 am with coffee in hand. She wouldn’t be working until 9 pm, with a nanny caring for her children, all while striving to secure a prestigious postcode and ensuring her children attend the best private schools on offer. Her soul was alive. She understood the mission. She understood her purpose.
While women are permitted to work in Islam (some may find themselves in various circumstances or necessary professions, such as a doctor), it’s crucial not to lose sight of what truly defines a woman. Khadijah (RA) exemplified unwavering devotion and obedience to Rasool Allah (s.a.w)—the greatest man who ever lived. She was not driven by worldly ambitions; her essence lay in her faith, selflessness, and nurturing spirit. Her legacy isn’t rooted in material success, but rather in her steadfast support for the Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w) and her sacrifice for the cause of Islam. She was the first to embrace Islam and believe in him when others doubted, offering profound wisdom and love, providing him with the reassuring words he needed after his encounter with Angel Jibreel in the Cave of Hira. “I’ve got you,” was the message behind her actions. She further demonstrated her wisdom by taking Rasool Allah (s.a.w) to her cousin, Waraqah bin Nawfal.
Our mother gave all her wealth for the cause without hesitation, consistently showing empathy and compassion for widows and the poor. Her essence lay in her faith and her support for the Prophet of Islam. She was his peace, strength, and unwavering support. This, in essence, is the legacy she left behind—far more powerful than any ephemeral ‘Boss Babe’ narrative. Furthermore, the wives of Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w), Khadijah (RA) and Aisha (RA), were instrumental in the propagation and establishment of Islam—the fastest growing religion on the planet.
Feminists’ Advocacy of Such Nonsense Demeans the True Masculinity of Prophet Muhammad (s.a.w)
By propagating this narrative, Muslim feminists are treading a perilous path. Rasool Allah (s.a.w), the mighty messenger of Allah, was Khadijah RA’s hero, king and leader. She looked up to him in every possible way and gave him the ‘hero-treatment’, so much so that He had this to say about her:
“I was nourished by her love!”(Sahih Muslim Book 44, Hadith 108)
Prophet Muhammad embodied the epitome of masculinity, exemplified by his just, righteous, compassionate and assertive leadership both on the battlefield and within his family home.
Feminism maybe the dominant frame today but this doesn’t mean it holds truth
Flirting with secularism will always harm us as individuals and as a society. Feminists are our oppressors not our liberators and our oppressors are not our teachers.
